October 4, 2011

Find the flamboyance

It's been a bit quiet on the Kenya front this week (except for armed kidnappings and Dengue fever outbreaks).  The hijinks are on hiatus; perhaps I've hit the three-month travel slump.  Mostly I've been tied up on the computer coding syntax in SPSS.  Actually, if we're being honest, mostly I've been on Google learning how to code syntax in SPSS, and a smaller percentage actually coding.  No matter how user-friendly people say it is, I will never like SPSS.  That is, until I switch back to Stata, at which point I will commence grumbling about that.  Mostly, I just resist change.  I will be a very cranky old person when the time rolls around.  

But on another note, everyone knows that one of the best parts of traveling is chuckling at signs mis-written in your language.  Since English is one of the official languages of Kenya, the spelling and grammar are rarely problems, but content can still be quite amusing.  This one remains a favorite, but here are a few more that I've collected over time.

Follow the arrow to find the flamboyance!

Flamboyant Hotel in Diani Beach.  Failing to take a photo with someone standing to the right of that sign has been added to my list of major life regrets.  

Doctor with a website.

I might be missing something, but I thought black magic was bad?  Endless luck, love and joy in your entire life.  If anyone needs some spiritual assistance, the Kenya country code is +254.  Also, if you go to his website (which I obviously did), you can see a full list of solvable problems including "troubled marriage," "all skin diseases," and "bewitched persons."

Marketable on Craigslist in 2 categories.

I walk past this place several times weekly, but no one else seems to bat an eye at it.  Uncomfortable euphemisms must differ across oceans.  

Rich in carbs!  

I'd love to see someone try to market anything as "rich in carbohydrates" in America.  Standards of beauty are different here.  Yesterday I was told that "Kenyan food has been good" to me, and that I've "grown big" since getting here.  While intended as a compliment, I still had restrain my offence enough to respond with a neutral (and intended to be rhetoric) "oh, you think so?"  Which earned me an enthusiastic, "I don't think- I know!"  Time to stop buying the high-carb cereals.  

For that presidential style your wardrobe is missing.

The Obama novelty hasn't worn off in Kenya to the extent that it has in the US.  From fashion wear to spare tire covers, he's an overseas trend-setter.  In any case, it's always good to have a plan B career in case 2012 doesn't swing his way.  

That's right.  Happiness and Love Restaurant.

A new restaurant opened up next door to my apartment: The Happiness and Love restaurant.  So, obviously, I had to go.  This is what it looks like from the entrance: 

Who knew that the keys to contentment were just down the street?  Of course, we all know that love ain't free, and this is no exception: pricey pricey! But I must assume that the exorbitant costs go into customer service (as well as pink and blue paint), given that a table of 2 is bestowed with approximately 6 attentive servers, and taking these pictures earned me a personal tour (even though I had already been there) and 10 business cards (even though I said I really didn't need them).  

1 comment:

  1. OK... I found your blog because I was googling happyness and love! I wanted to take the husband there for dinner tonight. Expensive you say?? Interesting...

    And LOL @ Golden Showers... Everytime I pass there, I laugh!

    And a cake matron is a necessity! Mine was quite dramatic, she even had firecrackers!